Losing employees and can’t see why? Executive coach Debbie Longo names the leadership blind spot draining trust, and how to fix it fast.
Episode Summary
Most executives think their team’s problems are personality clashes. Executive and business coach Debbie Longo argues it’s almost always behavior, and that the most common, most resistant behavior she coaches out of leaders is control and manipulation.
In this conversation, Debbie breaks down how thought becomes behavior, why real change requires a leader to actually see themselves, and the simple nightly habit that builds that self-awareness fast.
What You Will Learn
- Rebuild trust with your team by recognizing the one behavior pattern most executives never catch in themselves
- Stop the control-and-manipulation cycle before it tanks sales and drives out your best people
- Use a 2-minute nightly inventory to catch blind spots before they cost you your job
- Turn pressure from your board or boss into a fast, focused action plan instead of denial
- Understand why real behavior change can show up in weeks, and why it sometimes takes longer, and what determines which
- Protect your influence and credibility by leading from awareness instead of ego
Chapters:
00:01 – Episode intro: why behavior, not personality, drives leadership effectiveness
00:04 – The mindset-shift example: catching a bad outcome before it happens
00:07 – What hitting bottom actually looks like (divorce, job loss, losing a house)
00:08 – Why HR and managers underestimate how long real change takes
00:10 – The message to HR leaders and hiring managers: patience over pace
00:14 – How control and manipulation actually develops
00:16 – Why controlling leaders can’t see it in themselves
00:20 – “I change myself… everybody around me changes” — the ripple effect
00:20 – Where accountability fits in
00:22 – How Debbie tells a client they’re not actually changing
00:24 – The #1 tip: the nightly self-inventory exercise
00:26 – Wrap-up and where to find Debbie
Key Quote
“I changed my thinking, and everyone around me changed.” — Debbie Longo
Leadership Gap Diagnostic CTA
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About the Guest
Debbie Longo is an Executive Behavioral Coach, speaker, and podcast host with more than 24 years of experience helping leaders improve communication, accountability, and performance by changing behaviors that drive results. She equips executives and business owners with practical strategies that strengthen leadership, culture, and long-term business success.
Related Episodes
The Accidental Leader: Manager vs. Leader – https://studio.youtube.com/video/5ILUDJfM5IM/edit
Your Team is Being Under-Directed!! – https://studio.youtube.com/video/ZeS1BGk4rZs/edit
5 Steps to Move From Top Performer to True Leader – https://studio.youtube.com/video/ztrlut5eWrw/edit
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